Having two jobs and being a full time student is exhausting. I'm one strong, hardworking chick or just a mental case. I'd like to think I'm somewhere in between! When I'm falling asleep mid study or at stop lights I mostly just feel exhausted. Mix exhaustion with feeling completely overwhelmed and I become an emotional mess when someone does something as simple as eat the cookie I wanted. When I start talking to myself... that's when I'm convinced I'm mental. I can throw a real good pity party and complaining is my specialty. I've been known to skip showers for sleep. Dragging myself out of bed ten minutes before I have to leave has become a bad habit.
but...
It is still a wonderful life. Even when I feel like I'm barely holding it together. Just when I'm ready to throw in the towel and walk away something tenderly encourages and reminds me to wait. Be patient. Trust me. Bridget, look how much I love you. Let me lead this dance. My heart agrees and I take another step. My God is real.
Faith, trust.. pixie dust?
The pixie dust is all the wonderful and magical things in life. These are the silly things, the little things. The things that make me want to dance and fly. Something as little as bendy straws or pumpkin chocolate chip cookies in the fall. Maybe a beautiful moon. Or maybe, the complete and utterly foolish feelings someone can make you feel... the love for a spunky little girl named after you, or the butterflies and longing for someone so special.
I am blessed.
Well let me just say that I'm so very excited for this blog (yes, it is a funny word!). And I think you're right about life being a good mixture of dead exhaustion and someone taking the last cookie... versus beautiful moons and a God who'll never leave. It more than evens out. Such a good thought.
ReplyDeleteAh, love you! :) :)
You are a darling, and I enjoyed your lovely thoughts. Definitely choose sleep over showers...except when you absolutely canNOT go out in public like that! Suggestion for joy: pumpkin waffles or pancakes.
ReplyDeleteI will be stalking your blog.
Aunt Maureen
Aunt Maureen! you reading my blog makes me feel.. honored? I dont think thats the right word. Thrilled? Flattered? Anyway.. stalk away! :)
Deleteand i'm going to buy a waffle maker tomorrow so I can make pumpkin waffles.